How to read when you don’t feel like it
For many, reading is one of those activities that acts as an escape from the stress and difficulties of their lives, giving them the ability to fall into a world far from their own and their own problems. It can be a wonderful tool in promoting self-thought, but also a most efficient distraction from the never-ending stream of consciousness we all experience. But undoubtedly, there are those days (or in my case, weeks) when you struggle to find the joy in reading. Maybe because you are too busy, occupied with a new love on Netflix, or as it has been for me in the last couple of weeks, struggling with anxiety and feeling low.
This blog has always been a space that I and Zahrah have worked hard to make a positive place. But as she implied in her Heavy Heart Playlist post, we are all human, and as such, are not immune from the realities of the world. And those realities often result in people feeling low, overwhelmed and struggling to find enjoyment in the things they usually did. And that is an incredibly important thing to be transparent about. So, I feel no shame in saying that this is exactly how I have been feeling in the past couple of weeks.
I went back to school recently to pursue a PhD, and while it has been incredibly rewarding and fascinating, it has without a doubt been the most challenging thing I have ever done. What has made it even harder is that my usual coping methods for stress and anxiety have not been working. Reading has always been a way for me to disappear out of my world, giving me and my brain time to breathe so that when I came back to my responsibilities and goals, I felt refreshed and ready to take them on. However, when I would pick up a book, I found it impossible to concentrate, or worse, impossible to stop thinking about other things.
While I had planned to write a review of a book I had read over the winter, I decided that I wanted to write about how I’ve been working on overcoming these blocks and getting back to reading with enjoyment because that is what has been going on in my life and if it can help some of you, then it is worth opening up about.
Cut away the pressure
The first thing that I did to help get me back into reading was take the pressure away. As a self-proclaimed and a recognised one by most of my friends and family there can be a lot of pressure associated with reading at times. You are always expected to be reading something new or have recommendations ready at the top of your head for the next person who asks. That pressure can be increased by places like Bookstagram or the bookish community on Twitter. While they are lovely places, full of so much positivity and incredible bloggers, readers, and instagrammers, like all social media, it can be an unhealthy place to be at times.
For me, while I was struggling to find that enjoyment in reading, seeing other book bloggers or instagrammers constantly posting about their latest read and wonderful photography of TBR/Monthly Reading Lists was causing me to feel like I was not measuring up. Reading was slowly becoming equated as a chore in my brain and it was not something I wanted to happen. So, I made the decision to back away from that world for a while.
As a blogger I found this an incredibly nerve-wracking decision as I worried that it would lower how many viewers were coming to the blog, or my engagement. But at the end of the day, the most important thing to me is the quality of my blog posts, and while it may sounds dismissive, the social media is just not my priority. And, perhaps unsurprisingly, it did work to help me feel less like I needed to measure up. I have spoken before about not meeting your reading goals and how that is completely okay, and this experience has just been another reminder of that.
Make the action easier
The next thing I did to get my reading mojo back was to pull up audiobooks. There is often this unfair assumption that audiobooks do not count as ‘reading’ because the physical act is not there. But as many lovers of audiobooks will tell you, though it might be more passive, the impulse is a result of that same love for stories that draws most readers to books in the first place.
While I was struggling to be able to sit with a book in my hand without my mind wondering or fighting back pure exhaustion even though it was midday, audiobooks were my lifesavers. The ease, and the convenience of the medium makes so incredibly attractive to me. Especially when I feel the conflicting desires to lay on the couch and do nothing as well as get lost in a story. Plugging in my headphones and disappearing into a world without too much additional effort made it easier for me to shut my brain off from the stresses of my daily life.
There are times when the act of reading a specific book cannot be replaced. But similarly, there are books that I will argue are actually better read (or listened) to as an audiobook. Instead of shaming myself for arbitrary ideas of what qualifies as the “proper” way to read, I found a way to make an action that I love doing easier. Now, I am able to have my stories and my down time simultaneously!
Swallow your pride
When I struggling to read, or simply just feeling too low to find the excitement in a new story the best thing I did was to go back to the fiction that made me fall in love with reading in the first place. And guess what, most of those were children and young adult fiction. Am I older than the intended audience of those books? Yes. Am I too old to be re-reading them? Absolutely not! In fact, taking the time to remind yourself of why you fell in love with reading in the first place may be exactly what is needed.
And for my last tip: if you don’t feel like reading, even if you are a bookworm, don’t! And don’t let anyone make you feel ashamed of that.
~S~
